Brazen Brisket Bandit Bags Better Beef


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The Brisket Bandit has struck again leaving San Antonio’s Augie’s Bardedwire Smokehouse lighter to the tune of 13 smoked briskets and 10 cases of beer. This is the fourth such beef burglary in the past few months. However, things could change for the Brisket Bandit’s fortunes. This time out he was caught on security cameras. Now his mug is being flashed all over social media. Won’t be long before the bandit is bagged himself.

The grainy security footage (why is it always grainy?) shows a dude in a white baseball cap knocking around the smokehouse around 6:30 in the morning. Clearly, the Brisket Bandit prefers to do his “shopping” before anybody else gets up. As it happens, this restaurant is staffed around the clock. You don’t think that brisket cooks itself? The Brisket Bandit slipped in during a shift change and made off with his beef bounty. Yes, this is a brazen Brisket Bandit.


“I feel for the guy — obviously he has good taste,” owner Augie Cortez told the Huffington Post. Local authorities are hoping to tie the Brisket Bandit to other robberies. So far, he’s made off with 12 pork butts from The Smoke Shack, 200 pounds of brisket from B&B Smokehouse and 450 pounds of raw meat from Two Brothers Meat Market. Here’s a free tip for the police: Look for a new restaurant that has opened in the area that serves BBQ. You’ll find the Brisket Bandit there. Unless of course he is planning to throw one heck of a party. If so, then pass me the hot sauce.

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